To Break or Not? 5 reasons why you could use a break.

How many relationships have you found yourself in and needed to take a step away to gain clarity? Some may say “screw it I don’t want this anymore and let it all go”. Others stay and just deal. We often find that we put ourselves in redundant situations. But the main focus is to just get yourself together, press that pause button, and analyze what you’re in that relationship for today. Taking a break for the right reasons could definitely help. Here are 5 reasons why you could use a break.

5. Your life is not the center of your world anymore. Sometimes we engulf ourselves into our partner that we dive so deep and forget who we are or even how to function doing just basic things on our own. For example, you find it difficult shopping or choosing a nail polish or even what meal you want from the restaurant without your partner. You’ve choosen every little thing with your partner as if you don’t have a mind of your own. No More! Make your own choices and be comfortable with them.

4. He/She is beginning to ignore you or the things that are important to you. When you find yourself constantly repeating yourself to your partner about a topic or having a full blown hour long conversation that he/she doesn’t even remember anymore; it’s DISRESPECTFUL! Listening skills are so very important in a relationship! It’s part of communication!! And Communication is Key!!! Did you hear me, COMMUNICATION IS KEY, Ladies and Gentlemen. Seek out a therapist, I know it seems taboo for some but just one session could help. It can be a therapist just for yourself or for the both of you. All else fails talk to one of your unbiased friends or family member.

3. You’re not feeling loved. Playing a part-time role in a relationship is not fun. Nobody likes second place. You shouldn’t feel like you’re not sure how to plan a date night or a spontaneous time out with your partner just because he/she had plans you knew nothing about. Now don’t be confused with your partner’s career/life goals as his/her top priority because that’s probably what attracted you to your partner in the first place, but you knew that already right. If you and your partner speak on a daily basis or even live together it’s only fair he/she mentions their whereabouts and plans for the day or the weekend. Here’s an awkward situation to run into: Your partner’s mother calls and asks if you know where John* is tonite and you tell her you don’t know. She’s thinking what sorta partner doesn’t know where his/her loved one is, what sorta relationship is this. Now the mother assumes the relationship isn’t serious and may not take you serious either. Talk to your partner about everything even the smallest things, you may feel left out or part-time because your not communicating enough.

2. You’ve accepted all of his/her excuses and hear “it’s not that big of a deal”. Excuses should not be accepted. Your boss wouldn’t accept excessive late excuses so why would you accept them from your partner. You’re both trying to build a strong foundation in your relationship so don’t let cracks broaden until there’s no filler to smooth out the problems.

1. You haven’t let go of his/hers infidelity. For those that want it to work, find clarity in this situation; it’s gonna take forgiveness and mental focus to let go of the pain you feel. Don’t blame yourself and never let your partner blame you for they’re mistake. Infidelity hurts, don’t brainwash yourself into thinking this is your fault. If you’re married ’till death do us part’ seek counseling. If you’re not married but you want to make it work seek counseling and evaluate your goals as a couple. Maybe you both have grown in other directions and now it’s time to part. Relationships are investments. And your worth is gold. Take a break, if the relationship is worth it then you’ll get back together; if you’ve both grown apart, don’t worry you’ll be ok.

6 thoughts on “To Break or Not? 5 reasons why you could use a break.”

  1. Is it just me or do breaks seem to make most men feel like they can hop in and out at their leisure. This is just my personal opinion but when the break is initiated by the female its usually genuine and just an overwhelming feeling of emotions. Now, when the male initiates, 9/10 he has something going on with another female/ wants to create distance/ or uses the cliche line “its not you its me” to fall back just to end up with someone else and married in no time after you done invested 5+ years into him. Our generation is wack and the lack of gentlemen is scary!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I agree with you 100% when you say “the female is usually genuine” when taking a break. Yet some men that initiate Breaks can be genuine as well. Our generation is so consumed by those cliche lines that we’ve been brainwashed to believe those old lines. That’s why we should be learning from those that made mistakes using those wack lines.
      Thank you for reading my content and taking the time to comment. I appreciate it.

      -Original Good Girl

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  2. You’re points for taking a break are so valid. It gives sounds advice to those who are feeling unappreciated, but it also makes those who are doing the unappreciating see the fault in their ways. That is if they’re willing to come to terms with them.

    Sometimes your partner tells you your lacking and defensiveness and comfort won’t let you see it. Your post put it into perspective. Thanks.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you for you so much for taking the time to comment back. I shared this content because I’ve been on both sides of the spectrum, I personally feel like it’s a lot about growing and learning how to handle the challenges thrown at us in relationships.
      Let me say I am no professional at relationship advice. But I love to share with others and hear what they have to say.
      -Original Good Girl

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  3. Just read some of your blog posts. Although you bring up some valid points, the blog seems based off personal experience; rather than a culmination of experiences from both sexes.

    Regretfully, the bias allows me to assume the modern women (particularly of ethnicity) falls into relationships where she is not held of high value. This tells me, the black man is not present in the relationship… it also indicates her father wasn’t either.

    A father being present in a young woman’s life (especially a woman of ethnicity) offers her an ability to compare men, by examples her father spent her entire life offering. She is able to see her father in the man she may choose. The examples you offered in the blog, questions the judgement of the individual(s) in the relationship.

    But this also points the finger at the man, what’s his relationship with his mother like? Was his mother loved openly by his father? Did he communication at home?

    All of these issues are common in ethnic relationships, mostly due to emotional disparity and imbalances at home.

    I would write more, but offer more neutral examples backed by relevant statistics. I would also be patient with your writing style and content. I found grammatical errors that could have been avoided. Which disconnects the readers ability to fully engage with you. In addition, it fails your ability to convey your point of view or articulate accurately.

    In a time of social media acceptance, I would have failed you without sharing honestly. If this blog is a place for expression; allow it to express with openness, clarity and neutrality. This should not be where you bash your ex.

    If you have any questions, I have left my email attached.

    Happy writing!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you for reading my content, I appreciate your feedback and analysis of my work. While this is my first time at blogging and sharing with the public, I am fully aware that I may have a couple of bumps in the road such as grammar errors or I may even come across as misunderstood. However this blog is a conversation starter for all to share with their friends and family as I’ve had used my personal experience and the experience of others in relationships. I am certainly not here to man bash, ex bash, nor pour any negative energy of my personal experiences.
      I hope you can continue to comment on more content in the future.
      -Original Good Girl

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